Friday, 30 March 2012

short updates on various things!

assalamualaikum :)

a friend said, "liyana, stop being emo-ish and starts writing please. i dont wanna see just a video for the update"

haha. baik punya kena sound. x sempatlah nak update, and if sempat pun, tengah2 type, mesti terlelap. teehee. 3 weeks rupanya dah masuk clinics and alhamdulillah, ive started to adapt with the new schedule. not just new schedule, with new environment, dengan all the rules masa clinical life. no more lunch at 12, no more balik class kul 12, no more hari2 yang indah untuk pergi mall dan bersenang lenang. oh oh, rindu kot zaman-zaman tuh.

now lunch mesti after 2, perut mesti dah berbunyi gile. haa, nak dgr stu cite lawak, and sungguh x senonoh :p ade one day ni, i forgot to take my breakfast taw. so masa saya ngah scaling gigi patient, suddenly perut saya bunyi. aaaaa, malu gile, i asked my tummy to shut up, but mcm die lapar sgt agaknya. and bile sy pandang patient sy, die senyum. haha. guess die pun dgr kot :p

so moral of the story, please liyana, take ur breakfast dulu before keja. ur position dengan patient sgt dekat okay, mmg bunyi perut awak yang kuat tuh mampu didengari. hihi.

the rest? cut it short je lah eh one by one.

1. last thursday, saya bawak ayu, patient kanak2 saya. kan ritu dah bawak die nak check, so masa khamis ritu bawak die dtg untuk lecturer plak check btol x medical record yang sy buat psl budak ni. die habis sekolah pukul 930, so at 10, i went to her house and fetch dielah. so okay, bawak pegi campus. elooookkkk je duduk kan die atas denal chair, tbe2 muka dia chuak2. adui. seb bek dah wat preparation, belikan die susu siap2, gula2 sket, kek sket, nak bagi die makan nak hilangkan ketegangan. sat g dah suh makan, elok saya nak masukkan instrument dalam mulut, tbe2 die menangis beria. ohhhh, panic kejap. so ttp everything, letak everything, and tenangkan die, ingat die nak cool down. tapi tak. die cakap "AKU MAU PULANGGG!" sambil menangis dengan kuatnya. ya Allah luluh gile hati. haish budak ni, dahla nak dpt lecturer sy tuh dtg tuh susah, tbe2 dah elok lecturer ade, die tbe2 plak buat hal. so panic gile, rmi gile dtg tlg pujuk, tapi die dah tarik sampai lif nak turun, nak balik. mmg nampak gaya tade harapanla. so i went back after 10 minutes je sampai campus. wuwuwu. just after antar die balik, saya plak yang menitik air mata. haha. mana nak cari patient lagi ni dalam masa singkat mcm ni nak bukak status. tapi seb bek, my friend tolong. alhamdulillah, spe ntah mas cekup masa sy g hantar ayu, so dptlah aisyah. bukak lah status dia, and alhamdulillah, finally settle. just tunggu discussion je. yayyy! thank you friends :)

2. aisyah kesian sgt, gigi incisive die dah perforation dah sampai gums. huu. nak kena cabut ni, tapi mcm biasa lah lecturer saya ni asyik cuti je. so next tuesday baru boleh discuss and rsenye sy nak panggil aisyah dtg kot, nak jadikan die first patient saya untuk saya cabut gigi dia. kesian tgk dia. smpai bibir die pun dah ade cm lesion.

3. mak aisyah lawak gila. sy tanya, "ibu, anak ibu umurnya berapa tahun?" dia jawab 6 tahun. then bila tanya tarikh lahir, dia kata lahir tahun 2003. pastu kitorg berdua confused. haha. last2 sbb mak die macam yakin gile die umur 6 tahun, so sy ubah lah tarikh lahir dia ikot maths saya, kata dia lahir 2006, wpun mak die yakin aisyah lahir 2003, tp anak dia umur 6 tahun. haha.

4. semalam amer, afiq and fana datang rumah. we cooked for amer sebagai nak balas budi dia tolong kitorg ritu and somehow kitorg dah mcm agak close. so they came over to our house. kitorg serve ikan bakar, ayam percik and laksa penang. of course bukan saya yang masak, since saya pagi tuh clinic. just saya sorg je :( dorg yang len cuti, just last2 tuh leh la tlg potong2 sket masa wat ayam percik. and kitorg gatal, p tgk cite hantu kum-kum. and u know what, semalam after the guests balik, kitorg serumah sume tertdo at 1130 cmtuh kot, and saya terbgn at 2am. and ade org ketuk dinding dr belah luar. bukan luar rumah taw. pdhal sume org dah tdo. Allah je tahu chuak mcm mana, alhamdulillah, smbil2 baca ayat kursi, tertdo balik. lama kot sape ntah ketuk tuh. makin lama makin dekat. fuh. gatal lagi tgk cite antu.

5. banyak sgt assignments. letihla and malas. mcm biasalah malas tuh kan. lagi2 dapat tajuk ubat, saya paling malas nak fahamkan. tapi wikends ni kena wat. lecturer ko garang yana oi. so yana, on monday make sure siap!

6. saya addicted dengan lagu kosong - najwa latiff. i dun usually entertained to her songs, but lagu ni mcm something :)

7. saya rasa hati saya dah keras.

8. tapi saya perlu lembutkan balik. sbb kalo hati saya keras, saya dah x kan jadi liyana yang dulu.

9. april is coming soon. means that, the family is coming over here this month. pejam celik je, xlama lagi boleh peluk cium dorg. yayyy! :D i miss them actually.

10. i actually somehow dlm keadaan stress sebenarnya, sbb banyak sgt pakai duit skrg and mcm biasalah elaun x cukup. guilty lah asyik nak kena wat panggilan kecemasan selalu kat abah mintak duit. sian abah. dahla saya ade banyak lagi adik kat bawah sy :( sorry abah, but seriously, uve been very supportive lately ni. love you.

alrites tuh je kot. hee. have a goodnite sleep everyone. selamat berweekend dengan enaknya :) sweet dreams. assalamualaikum.

pagi pagi dah menangis. haih.

Tuesday, 27 March 2012

muhasabah cinta

wahai pemilik nyawaku,
betapa lemah diriku ini,
berat ujian dariMu,
kupasrahkan semua padaMu

Tuhan, baru kusedar,
indah nikmat sihat itu,
tak pandai aku bersyukur,
kini kuharapkan cintaMu

kata-kata cinta terucap indah,
mengalun berzikir di kidung doaku,
sakit yang kurasa biar jadi penawar dosaku

butir-butir cinta airmataku,
teringat semua yang Kau beri untukku,
ampuni khilaf dan salah selama ini,
ya Ilahi,
muhasabah cintaku..

Tuhan, kuatkan aku,
lindungiku dari putus asa,
jika ku harus mati,
pertemukan aku dengan Mu


selamat malam. hari yang sungguh kosong. hmm. mimpi indah, assalamualaikum :)

selamat malam :)



mengalir air mata,
indah sangat lirik dia :)


mimpi indah kay? assalamualaikum :)

Monday, 26 March 2012

yes :)

orthodontics

assalamualaikum :)

just got back from clinic and rse mcm excited gila nak tulis blog. ive got my supervisor for orthodontics department!

department yang wat braces ape sume tuh. yang paling susah nak dpt patient tuh, yang paling banyak songeh tuh. yang wat removable appliance, tapi control patient kena sampai 30x. yang selalu patient dtg halfway tu, pastu dah malas dah nak datang, pastu kitorg kena cari patient baru and start all over again tuh.

hihi.

haaa, dan sukacita dimaklumkan, saya dapat supervisor yang paling cerewet, teliti, yang kalo org tanya,

"kamu dapat siapa, liyana?"

"doctor ayu"

:O

ha sume yang akan melopong yang mcm tuh. haha. aduhai. apelah nasib badan. tapi tape, go go semangat liyana. susah2 supervisor, insya Allah die boleh ajar dengan baik. amin.


cool gile mask ni! haha. 
i think i should have a box of it, pakai bile nak pegi menghadap lecturer yang garang2, die membebel2 ke ape, mulut kat dalam dah muncung pun, kat luar tengah senyum nampak gigi kapak lagi ha :B


okie, nak berehat. nnt malam saya update lagi. tata!

Sunday, 25 March 2012

alahai

nampak gaya, harapan nak grad dengan gigi yang at least cantek sket bulan 4 nih, tinggal harapan jelah.
nak g control braces pun tade duit, pokai abes dah.
redha jelah nnt gmbr grad, gigi terabur2. hihi. 


sengaja sengetkan, kunun xlah obvious sgt gigi terabur tuh :P

goodnite everyone, mimpi indah :)

breaking free

assalamualaikum :)

hari ni bermula dengan tak berapa bagus, i got a migraine attack this morning. i bashed my head for several times tadi, now rse mcm kepala sakit mcm nak benjol. huu. last night was horrible. i dreamt of something that hurts me very deep, until u know what, as i woke up, i felt tears on my cheeks.

sigh.

like seriously, i dunno whats wrong with myself lately. i easily get annoyed, im not in the mood of talking that much. i easily get offended. im lazy. okay, lazy isnt occasionally lah, even mood okay pun im always lazy :P my emotions is going down steeply, and staying at the lowest of it.

dear blog, can i just spill it out here? tataulah, even skrg ni, banyak sangat rasa yang terperuk dalam hati. not that i didnt try to find someone to share, but entah, bile dah whatsapp, bbm atau nak ajak org tuh berborak, tiba-tiba jadi mcm wordless. last2 terus tak cite, and yes, again, terperuk lagi dalam. so rsenye, betterlah saya tulis kat sini, to those who care about this stupid feelings, can continue reading, but mind you, bukan saya nak raise up your sympathy, but just simply because i need to let it out, to those who cares and mahu memahami. enough with just being understanding. and if you dont like it, i dont mind if you wanna leave, but please come again, after this nnt i planned to write about my crazy siblings :)

first, about myself. one thing that i really hate about myself is that, saya ni seorang yang sangat transparent. kalau saya sedih, orang boleh tau saya sedih. and if saya sgt happy, semua orang boleh tau saya sgt happy. and the fact that, i just love to share all the feelings that i own tuh dgn everybody, until to certain things that i thought wasnt that nice to be told to everybody, saya akan terbtau jugak. cane yeh? for instance, psl perasaan sy. yang kecewa, sedih kununnya. i know, i shud act strong, not to really show that i was so much affected by it, and demi Allah, ive tried to hide it deep down in this heart, but at last, x tahan sgt, i started to post some sad songs here. and mcm urgh, okay, somehow a bit org dah dpt tgkap, oh yana x get over it lagi.

:(

tak sukelah, serious. mcm skrg ni yg sy tgh buat, sebenarnya sy x suke, tapi saya dah lama sgt pendam, try to act strong, tapi entah, tgkla, it hurts me, makan dalam gile bile simpan lama2. yang lagi teruk skang ni, saya mcm dah susah nak cerita kat org personally, and i find comfort in writing it. *facepalm* certain org mesti akan rse saya try nak raise up sympathy, but tell u what, saya sebenarnya benci bile org simpati kat saya. care and simpati is due menda yang sgt berbeza. i can detect it by the way u respond to me. ala, nape ni yana, nape nape? hmm.

second, walaupun saya ckp saya transparent, tapi ade exception to perasaan marah. i cant really show yang saya marah. mcm to certain things, yang saya rasa saya dah dibackstabbed, i just cant be mad. mcm mana eh nak ckp? erm, kdg2 bagi sy, i just have to have a lil bit of perasaan dendam, so that i wont fall to the same trap twice. but sadly, apa yang saya rse sndr, saya rse sy tade. tho i know that person cerita buruk psl sy, putarbelitkan ape yang saya cakap, but the moment that person dtg balik kunun nak berborak ke ape, still saya akan treat nicely, mcm seolah2 die tak pernah buat apa2. kan x bagus mcm tuh :( nanti kena pijak2, sbb nanti saya yang akan hurt again2, sbb rse dah layan baik2 dah, nape ko wat camni. haa. okay bukan perasaan dendam kot yang betul, mcm perasaan berjaga2. tuh lebih betul kot.

and entah, saya mcm banyak x puas hati dengan sendiri. banyak sgt menda yang sy rse x elok ada dlm diri sy ni. saya suka tgk perempuan yang sgt tinggi spiritualnya. yang sgt tegas. yang sangat firm. saya suka! sbb saya tak. hati saya cepat menangis, cepat lembik, cepat tersentuh. sape yang rapat dengan saya, sume org akan sdr dgn menda ni. when i love, i love too much, when im sad, im being sad too much, when i cried, i cry too much. kalo happy too much pun sakit gak, sbb at the end of the day, saya mesti menangis.

i just have to learn to control my emotions lah. shudnt talk that much, shudnt show that much kan. tp bila menda tuh dah memang diri saya, susah sgt nak hide. ade pernah saya mengadu to a friend, she said :

"yana, dah bape lama aku kenal ko, ko dah memang org yang mcm tuh and we love you sbb perangai ko yang mcm tuh. why shud u change yourself to be someone yang bukan you yourself. u gonna hurt yourself taw bila u being hypocrite to yourself. sakit nnt hati yang dah sedia lembut tuh. mcm lah aku tatau, nnt mulalah kau menangis, sampai basah bantal. aku tau kdg2 ko rse mcm banyak sgt ujian dapat kat ko, and aku x nafikan, disebabkan hati kau yang sayang terlalu banyak pd org, kau selalu diuji dengan orang2 yang kau sayang. family, lover, friends ape sume. tapi sbb Allah tau, wpun ko diuji dengan mcm2, kena backstabbed ape sume, tp sbb hati kau yang lembut tuh, Allah tau kau akan still treat org elok2 and forget about menda tuh. tak sume org boleh wat cmtuh taw, itu satu keistimewaan, bukannya keburukan.."

and she hugged me lepas tuh. memang banjir ah. basah baju dia. huu.

tatau, tatau nak ckp :( i tried okay, nak pandang semua menda dr segi positive side, sbb memang itu yang sy tengah buat skrg, tapi mesti ade one time, saya tergelincir, dan saya akan sedih. saya boleh senyum spnjg hari sdgkan dalam hati saya menangis sekuat-kuatnya. saya bleh mengalah dengan apa saja, tapi just please jgn ambil kesempatan terhadap saya. sy boleh maafkan ape saja, tapi tolonglah, jgn main-mainkan saya. saya letih. please faham please. saya taknak keraskan hati saya, sebab once bila hati saya keras, saya akan jadi seorang yang sgt kasar. 

sbb tuh skrg, sy banyak diam, sy set myself alone. bukan sbb ape, sbb sy salu rse i lost myself all of sudden. saya diam dr org2 yang tanya, saya senyap, sbb saya tatau sy nak cerita apa. kalau ade depan mata, sy hanya boleh nangis je depan awak, dan fhmlah ape yang saya rse, dr tangisan tuh. i tried real hard to act strong, tp susah bile hati sendiri ni memang jenis lembik, suka dimanjakan ape sume. eii, benci.

sorry, banyak sgt saya spill out. in spite of advices from friend, skrg i find peace and comfort jugak by reading inspiring posts by yasmin mogahed, surely korang tau kan? hati yang kacau ni, selalu jadi tenang, bila solat. betapa selalunya jiwa saya kacau, sampaikan skrg, sy selalu ternanti2 waktu solat. nak cepat2, nak duduk dengan Dia. to be honest lah, dulu sy adalah org yang salu melambatkan solat, tapi skrg sy ngah cuba ubah, sbb pelan2 saya rse sy dpt kemanisan dalam setiap sujud tuh. org lain mesti dah lama rasa kan, tapi at least sy bersyukur, skrg a bit saya dah rasa :) 

dahla, makin mengarut dah post ni. semua ni ikhlas dari hati saya. saya betul2 tgh lost in translation. u mite see me smiling, but u mite not have the idea what is there behind that smile. sorry if sy fragile sgt lately ni, i act weirdly, i lock myself alot in my room ke ape, cos now, i just need time to gather back myself. ill be fine insya Allah, please dont let me be alone, saya bukanlah seorang yang sgt firm ke ape, sy sgt bergantung pd family and my friends. hold me if u see me is about to fall. 

seriously, sorry, kalau ada yang menyampah ke ape, rse sy exposed too much ke ape, tapi rsenye tape kot, this is my blog, and saya dah ckp awal2  tadi, sy faham if u wanna leave. but to those yang feel me, i appreciate it so much, how i wish u guys are here :'(

hmm. sorry to spoil ur sunday with this entry. my head starts aching. laptop nye radiation perhaps. take care people, wish u have superb sunday :)

much love.

Saturday, 24 March 2012

this is the part of me that u never gonna take it away from me


if only i can register myself to the army too.
angkat org mcm dlm video clip ni, saya penah kot, masa BTN :P

sorry

ya Allah, bersihkanlah hatiku. hiasilah peribadiku :)

saya memang nampak mcm nakal or as what u said, nampak mcm jahat2 je. terima kasih untuk komen itu. saya akan berusaha jadi lebih baik ye kalo dah itu tanggapan awak pd sy :)

and dear friend, sorry, tadi ade a friend tegur, nape saya pakai perkataan bodo sdgkan sy jrg gune that word. die pesan jangan kerana nak rebel, pegi guna perkataan2 mcm tuh. okie dear, thank you :)

goodnite. jiwa kacau lagi. saya ni dah x cm saya yang biasa this past few days. aihh. sweet dreams. much love.

Friday, 23 March 2012

today is hari nyepi in indonesia :)

assalamualaikum :)

hari nyepi ape eh? to be honest saya sendiri pun tatau in details, but from what i know a bit when i was in Bali, hari nyepi ni disambut scr besar-besaran oleh org dekat Bali. they will be like all sunyi sepi, they cant even turn on the tv, for one period of time, they cant even turn on the lights, azan pun untuk hari ni takleh dilaungkan, even ambulance pun tak boleh bergerak pakai siren. hee. so tuhla kot. hari nyepi is hari sunyi sepi.

anyway, sorry last few entries mcm bodo je emo2. my emotions arent at its stable conditions, sometimes it fluctuates here and there. but still im fine, alhamdulillah.

and this time im all excited to share with you guys about my clinical's life! hee :D

as ive told you before, now im in my periodontics and paediatric dentistry's cycle. pasal perio rsenye for now i just can say what i did is just scaling, since i have to complete 7 requirements first for scaling, then only i can proceed to cases solving. and rsenye for first case nak amik psl gingivitis kot. tataulah, later nnt we talk about that okie?

for pedo, yesterday was the first day i dealed with my first patient. named ayu, age 7. owh nak cerita dulu psl nak cari patient. ya Allah, seriously, nak cari patient sangatlah susah. nak convince budak2. aiyoo. kena pancing dengan macam2. now, almost every evening ill be wandering around my neighbourhood area cari patient. mcm ala2 'jalan-jalan cari patient'. ha cmtuhla. asal jumpe group of kids je, tarik nafas dalam2, dr jauh dah sengih dah nak buat muka konon approachable kakak mithali. haha.

ade one time tuh, i went to approach this group of children, tengah main badminton. masa mula2 they saw me coming, sume okay je duk gelak2 lah apelah. then as i reached near to them :

"hello adik. adik, kaka mahasiswa moestopo, kaka lagi nyari pasien untuk praktek kaka di kampus. kaka butuh pasien anak ni, bisa ga kaka liat giginya? bagus ga? atau ada ga syiapa2 yang sedang sakit gigi, mau giginya ditambal atau dicabut? yuk, tunjukin ke kaka"

:)))))))))))))))))))

haaa, lebar mcm tuh saya senyum :P muka friendly abes ah, taulah kan, muka saya dah memang sedia muka kerek, so berusaha dengan sehabis baik lah nak wat muke friendly, biar budak2 ni tak takot. korg faham kot kan ayat atas tuh? yg penting kaka tuh bukan pemain bola, it stands for kakak :P

and the moment i finished saying those ayat yang saya akan ulang to every group of children yang saya jumpe, dr yang tengah tergelak sakan, luas2, ha amik, sume katup mulut! haha. serapat-rapatnyaaaaaaaa! :DD aduyai, and that moment mesti gelak gile dalam hati. so masuk plak part pujuk memujuk. pujuk itu ini, beria2, and so far i can say, sumenye berjaya. at least if i cant get them to bring to my campus, at least pujukan saya boleh lah buat dorg bukak mulut so that i can check.

the problem is that, nak cari patient yang menepati citarasa lecturer saya. aduhai susahlaaaaa. stress pun ade. nak dalam satu mulut, ade 5 gigi yang ade different cases. tuh yang payah. and kdg2 dah convince2 bila dorg bukak mulut, actually x teruk sgt pun gigi, so just pancing dorg dtg jela, ajar kan cara nak berus gigi :)

oh berus gigi sini panggil sikat gigi okay :P and ubat gigi they called as odol. hihi.

okay back to my patient, smlm bawak lah ayu, nak amik status all her teeth. umur 7, semuanya masih gigi susu lah, except for first molar dah ade and incisive. beramik, berjemput, berhantar, berpulang. haa. ayattt :P sini mmg dah mcm culture kot, kitorg kena tatang2 patient tuh, or else susah sgt nak dpt dorg dtg, but luckily ayu is a one nice girl. i need to keep this girl for about several times, nak suh die dtg for status, treatment and what not. aihh. kesian pun ade. masa tengah duk check2 gigi die, dr mula2 being so cooperative, tibe2 ade one time tuh, die chuak. nangis, nak balik, tamo dah kena check.

okay, ms tuh i panicked gile. seriously. so keluarlah pulak ilmu memujuk yang lebih personal. bagilah minum air susu, janji belikan itu ini, tutup lampu dental chair sume taknak bagi die gemuruh. pujuk lama jugaklah. berborak kejap ngan die, sbb agaknye die gemuruh bile dgr bunyi handpiece. siap cakap, kalo ayu tak dtg, nnt kakak kena pecat. haha. tapi biasalah, budak :) after bout 20mins gakla memujuk, finally dia dah okay. alhamdulillah. urut dada kejap saya. kalo die xnak, penat wey nak cari patient lagi :P

its a great experience lah, seronok pun ye, and very exhausting. mcm skrg, everyday, akan balik kul 2 lebey, straight from 8am.  and balik je, sume me and my housemates akan gone. haha. keletihan. adaptations kot kan. and plus, doing dentistry ni, banyak pakai personal hand skills. oh talking about hand skills ni, risau lah sbnrnye, sometimes rase macam sy nih tade bakat je. but tape2, maybe still too early kan? definitely as time goes by, my skills wud be better, insya Allah :)

alrites, thats all for now. mcm2 actually nak share pengalaman clinics. but nnt pelan2 saya cite :) i love my clinical life seriously, sbb dia buat saya busy, so i have less time to think of unwanted things. hee!








hehe. ini ayu, dia suruh dia difoto, sbb gigi die warna merah2 lepas kena letak disclosing solution. ngehngeh. okie, take care everyone, wish u a fabulous friday. hari jumaat rajin2 lah baca surah al kahfi :)

assalamualaikum :)

homesick

it is very nice, if theres someone who will pat u on your back, and ask "are you okay?".
ive been keeping a lot of things behind these smiles.
if only u can understand.

for so many times ive tried to write, but at the end of it, i gave up. the mood for everything is everywhere.

to act strong while ure actually not, thats the hardest. but definitely, i wont stop  trying.
ya Allah, You heard my prayers. i hope just a lil bit, i can know the reasons why :(

sorry for acting foolishly, ive lied too much to myself already.
to act like i dont care to the thing that i care the most, phew.

and as for now, nothing is more convincing than the verse from Quran that says, Allah doesnt burden a person more than he can bear.
:)

astaghfirullah.
on another note, thank you busy-ness for distracting me a bit, i love my clinical years anyway.

Tuesday, 20 March 2012

:(

blog lama dah privatekan.
i was supposed to delete it, but i just cant.
so suh org tukarkan password, so i wont know about it.
sempat jugak browse thru a few post,
sedar2 a few teardrops are already there running thru my cheeks.

so i stop.
hmm..

byebye about to share, for 4 years ive been writing with you,
maybe someday, ill be back to read u again.

:)

bersungguh2, mcm2 saya buat, nak lupakan kenangan.
kuat kuat kuat! heee! okay, nite again semua orang. much love.

Monday, 19 March 2012

confused

susah nak describe.
lost in translation.
jiwa kacau.
too much things to be told, yet cant find the right words to everything.

so..

:)

have a good nite sleep everyone. sweet dreams. have a terrific tuesday. assalamualaikum :)

p/s : oh Allah, Engkau Maha Mengetahui segala setiap sesuatu yang terbuku di dalam hatiku. maka permudahkanlah segalanya ya Allah, sesungguhnya Engkaulah yg Maha Penyayang ~

Sunday, 18 March 2012

putrajaya hot air balloon festival


the fact that again, I MISSED THIS is killing me!
hot air balloon kot, sape tak teringin nak naik??!! T___T

Friday, 16 March 2012

enambelasmarch

tatau nak ltk tajuk ape sbnrnye. hee.  tak lrt nk menaip jugak, tp nk jugak tulis sikit dkt blog ni. demam, headache, selsema. tgh2 tido, hidung berdrh. pehal ntah.

today 1st day scaling patient, n skills masih sucks. hee. but tape, practice makes perfect kan? nnt isnin sambung lagi, but seriously im super duper happy that ive already entered the final phase before becoming a real doctor.

okay, kepala dah x lrt tunduk. take care, enjoy the weekends :)

good night, sweet dreams. much love. assalamualaikum.

p/s : ive just realised, that im back to be the girl who reads novel to sleep than having the late nite conversation. and im okay with that :)

good night :)

besok first patient saya. semoga semuanya dipermudahkan. dahla tengah demam, sakit kepala and selsema. aduyai.

but still, im all excited :D

sleep tite everyone. hopefully besok bangun sakit2 ni sume dah hilang. sweet dreams.

assalamualaikum :)

p/s : saya dah on balik fb. teehee!

Wednesday, 14 March 2012

hidayah

saya ade ramai kawan nama hidayah, ada jugak sedara nama hidayah. tapi itu bukan isunya.

" hidayah tuh kadang-kadang Allah dah tunjuk, sama ada kita nak grab and digest je hidayah yang dah diberikan tuh. setiap peristiwa kan memang ada hikmahnya. yang sakit tuh, kalau dinilai dengan mata hati, akan nampak manisnya bila hidayah Allah itu kita cerna.. "

okay. kata-kata seseorang teman. true enough.

hati yang dulu sentiasa dahagakan cinta dan perhatian seorang jejaka. sampai kadang-kadang lupa, dek kerana penangan cinta. tidak menyalahkan sesiapa, salah sendiri padan muka. bila hati terusik, diajak sang teruna untuk didengarkan hati yang ingin berbisik. semuanya dia. dia dan dia.

sampailah satu masa, Allah rindu. Allah tarik apa yang dia dah pinjamkan. maka mulalah hati tak keruan. menangis tak berhenti, hati jadi rawan. serba dibuat, serba tak kena, rasa lemah, lesu, tak bermaya. ade lah dekat seminggu dua. tapi sampai satu tahap, hati letih. mata pedih. perih weh perih. terduduk, termangu, berfikir. tarik nafas dalam-dalam, sambil dipasang alunan zikir.

dan sekali lagi air mata mengalir. bukan kerana rindu yang selalu ditangisi, tapi kali ini, rasa bersalah menyelubungi. bersalah pada Allah pemilik segala hati. hanyut dibuai kasih, sampai kan kadang2 yang sepatutnya dijaga terus disisih. keluh kesah kecewa, riang hati gembira, yang sepatutnya diunjurkan syukur kepadaNya dahulu sebelum orang lain, dikongsi dengan dia yang kununnya lebih istimewa dengan yang lain. astaghfirullah. salah. benar-benar salah. memang patutlah, semua yang diimpikan Allah ubah, supaya kebergantungan terhadapNya tidak digugah.

khilaf seorang hamba Allah.

kalau difikir yang buruk, macam-macam lah, takkan pernah sudah. itu salah. ini salah. tiada penghujungnya, sampai bila-bila hati akan berduka. pikirlah yang indah. yaitu Hidayah. Allah menyedarkan hati, orang-orang yang Allah sayang. mungkin diuji dengan sesuatu yang pada dasarnya tidak nampak indah, tapi disebaliknya, terselit seribu satu hikmah. salah satunya, hati dah kembali sepenuhnya milik Allah.

bukan dah berputus asa pada cinta manusia. tidak. rasa itu masih ada. tak berubah, tak diganti pada sesiapa. tapi, Alhamdulillah, Allah tarik dekat padanya, dan Allah berikan keyakinan disetiap air mata yang berlinang kerana mengadu jiwa yang tidak tenang, keyakinan untuk usikan hati yang kadang-kadang datang tanpa diundang. sehingga setelah semuanya diadukan pada Allah, rasa redha itu datang. hati kembali lapang. kuasa sebuah doa bukanlah calang-calang, tapi sebagai senjata seorang mukmin yang harus dipegang.

disaat hati tak didengari, ada Allah yang menemani. di saat rintihan hati tidak dihiraukan sama sekali, Allah ada memujuk hati. di saat hati meruntun mau dirawati, Allah ingatkan tentang Al-Quran, penawar segala nurani.

mungkin agak lambat hati ini sejuk, susah sebenarnya mahu dipujuk. tapi alhamdulillah, hari-hari Allah berikan petunjuk. wahai pemilik tulang rusuk, akan dibiarkan hati ini hanyut mencari keredhaanNya, dan semoga di suatu saat yang telah ditentukan, melaluiNya jugalah akan disatukan, dua hati yang Allah dah pasangkan sejak kita masih dalam kandungan.

:)

semua manusia pernah berbuat salah, yang penting tahu mengaku salah. dan semua manusia, ada hak untuk buktikan bahwa dia dah berubah.

cerita siapa? entah. tepuk dada tanyalah jiwa.

currently listening to : permata yang dicari :)

goodnite. sweet dreams. assalamualaikum.

even if its not necessary :)

saya bukanlah peminat korea, tapi lagu ni dengar malam2, after midnite, layan jugak :)




antara kita, yang ada hanya doa. dan kuasa sebuah doa itu luar biasa :)

have faith :)

" but perhaps u hate a thing and its good for you ; and perhaps u love a thing and it is bad for you. and Allah knows while you know not " ( al Baqarah 2 : 216 )

i hate the emo me today. sigh.

good night. sweet dreams. much love.

p/s : i am excited for tomorrow! :D

Tuesday, 13 March 2012

dulu lain, sekarang lain :P




beza tang mana eh? :P

p/s : satu yg masih sama. hati. hee. goodnight, mimpi indah. assalamualaikum :)

Monday, 12 March 2012

hello monday! :)


a new start, a new beginning :)
to all batchmates 2008, happy clinical-ing. semoga kita semua dapat grad, insya Allah latest by march 2014.
amin~

okay, off to clinic, take care everyone! assalamualaikum :)

tomorrow is the day!

assalamualaikum :)

what a tiring sunday. my body doesnt feel that good these past few days, prolly because of the weather. well, just now, i went to Mangga Dua, to meet my aunty. went there alone, with all the miscommunications that happened between both of us, i end up tawaf 3 buildings and only at the last one i met her. oh my. Mangga Dua is super crowded, especially at the ITC. but nevermind, that is how it always was. when someone that i knew came here, especially family, no matter how short the meeting will be, ill try to spare some time to meet them. why?

because i just feel good when i meet someone who is dear to me :)

and tomorrow is gonna be my first day of my clinical years. for the first cycle, i got pedodontics and periodontics departments. huu. pedodontics is among the hardest, according to the seniors, but nevermind, ive promised myself ill give my best to this. wish us luck okay? :)

and a confession to be made, though most of my friends had already be in the anxious state of going to the clinics tomorrow, i wonder why i didnt feel anything yet. weird. perhaps maybe ive set in my mind, usually the 1st week of cycle, most of us wont do that much works, will be focusing more to the discussions and some briefings. ya Allah, i hope i get a nice lecturer as my mentor.

okay, thinking about the mentor, i suddenly felt butterflies in my stomach. hihi. hey chill lah liyana, things gonna be alrites, have faith and work hard :)

alrites, guess i need to get some rest. my body wasnt at its best today. tomorrow is going to be such a long day, dental instruments hunting, meeting amer nun jauh di jakarta barat. huu. so good nite everyone, sweet dreams, take care.

tamo monday blues okay esok? :P *pesan dekat diri sendiri jugak sbnrnyer*

p/s : nothing in this world is truly yours liyana. no matter how much u think u deserve a thing or a person, u just dont know, what do u actually want might be someone else's. why? because u dont know what the future beholds. so keep calm and pray hard okay liyana? :)



to all the ones that got away from me.
i just miss all of you :'(

Sunday, 11 March 2012

happy sunday, people :)

Forgetting isnt enough. You can paddle away from the memories and think they are gone, but they will keep floating back again and again. They circle you like sharks and you are bleeding your fear into the sea. Until, unless something, someone can do more than just cover the wound.

- Sara Zarr, Story of a  Girl  -

Friday, 9 March 2012

perfect vacation with perfect companions pt 2 =)

assalamualaikum :)

hee. punyelah lama pending yang part 2 ni. maaf maaf. okay, so ritu ade update pasal day 1st pegi kawah putih kan? then the next day, kitorg sume pegi Trans Studio Bandung, konon nak main2, have fun and lepas tension! and seriously, kitorg sangat enjoy every second of it :D

plan kunun nak g kul 9pagi, balik 3 petang, sume x jadi. kitorg balik kul 1030 malam to jakarta :P

let the pictures do the talkings la okie? :)


oh ni kitorg before gerak naik keta sewa, to trans studio. amik gambar sat kat depan hotel.
hotel x bape hotel la, mcm rumah, yg ade bnyk2 bilik.
hee. student pun, budget ciput :P 
wpun yang teruna2 tuh encik pilots sumenye, tapi sbb dorg follow kitorg, ikotlah jugak kitorg stay sini :D




trans studio nih actually more like genting indoor + time square. ha cmtuhla i can say. die jauh sikit dari kota bandung. an indoor theme park. baru je bukak kalo x slh, somewhere around oct last year kot :)
entrance fee is : rp 150,000, all u can play :)




kalau tengok masa mula2 masuk tuh, die somehow a bit mcm uss, singapore tuh. seriously. if nak meet cartoon characters ke ape, banyak kat sini.






masa ni nak tgk 4D movie, marvell movie. superheroes. hee. best2. tho personally die x lah sebest 4D movie USS, but somehow quite okaylah. we enjoyed the show anyways :)))




my favourite of all. sonok gila.  tak ingat nama die ape, tapi siyes best! :D
u shud give urself a try! 






nak marilyn monroe, tade plop. g toilet kot. haha.


nih swing, yang bergerak ke kiri kanan. yang membuatkan sume org mual. tapi best! hihi




masa ni dalam science centre. best2. lots of things u can discover dalam ni. mcm ala2 petrosains kot. versi indonesia :D




die ade sort of mcm game. tgkla, saya gigih gile duk men menda tuh, kena mcm release kan knots tuh, berjaya wat skali je. pastu give up dah bile dpt yang lain. leteyyy weyyy pk :D




kebetulan time kitorg datang, ade grup of malaysian students gak datang. masliana and the gang :)


masa ni nak naik cam racing car cmtuhla. nak upload gmbr, tapi die mcm x nak rotate, stress betul. so upload yg ni jelah tanpa racing car nye.


penah pegi genting? ni mcm sungai rejang flume ride tuh. yang naik cm kayu balak, pastu splash dalam air.
basah habessss, tapi best! tinggi gile, so mmg hebat gak lah splash dia :D


ada wall climbing jugak! best gile. tahu tak, ms saya panjat ni, ms nak naik tuh semangat gile. smpailah one stage, mcm stuck tak jumpe batu nak pijak, terpandang bawah.
terus gayattttt! tapi sbb dah penat naik, sy try gak and finally dpt reach button merah atas tuh. 
x sempat amer nak amik gmbr, sbb sy cpt2 turun, sbb gayat gile! hahaha






ni mcm dragon ride, budak2 punya. tapi layan ah, dah nama bayar, naiklah sume :D


ni naik mcm ride yang pusing around the theme park yang tergantung tuh. kalo korg g genting indoor theme park, ha die mcm yang tergantung, ade swan la apelah, kapal yang bergerak kat atas tuh around the indoor theme park :)


haa, nilah die sungai rejang flume ride tuh. haha. suke2 aku je. tuh nama game ni kat genting :P






tu dia marilyn and elvis. and michael jackson jugak. tapi versi muka jawa. hihi :P






okay, actually main highlight die roller coaster ni. kat sini ade one of the fastest roller coaster, die bergerak ke depan, and moving backwards balik lepas tuh. sumpah laju gile and best!
sbb sy peminat roller coaster! something diff, sebab die sgt laju!

okay jgn percaya afiq ni, sbb die tak naik pun sbnrnyer, die penakut roller coaster :P






encik charlie chaplin :D



hee. for me, sume ni worth it, and rsenye jadi lagi best sbb i went there with bunch of friends yang sgt best. kitorg memang spend time gila-gila punya. sume menda kitorg stop and enjoy, and sbb kitorg g weekdays, so x ramai. ade few rides yang naik 2 3 kali. hihi.

so my advice is that, datangla time weekdays seriously. and sapa yang suke bergambar, i think u gonna love this place, just like me! :D

okie. cukup kot. nak tawu pape, let me know. out of 5 stars, i give 4 lah to trans studio ni. eceh mcm bagus je nak rate2 ko ni yana :P