Tuesday, 31 July 2012

bawalah rindu ini jauh, ya Rabb ~*

#ramadhan



alhamdulillah, bakal masuk ke phase kedua di bulan ramadhan : phase pengampunan :)

semoga phase pertama (phase kerahmatan pada 10 hari pertama), kita semua dilimpahkan rahmat yang tak terhingga olehNya, insya Allah.

Monday, 30 July 2012

where are you thou?



i pray for your happiness and well-being, always :')

goodnite, so the rest of these thots, i left them all to Allah kerana Dialah sebaik-baik tempat bergantung harap :)

missing the beauty of nagreg









betul orang kata, hijau tuh sangat menenangkan :)

Sunday, 29 July 2012

ayatul Quran :)

"Allah tidak membebani seseorang melainkan kesanggupannya. dia mendapat (pahala) dari (kebajikan) yang dikerjakannya dan dia mendapat (siksa) dari (kejahatan) yang diperbuatnya. (mereka berdoa), "Ya Tuhan kami, janganlah Engkau hukum kami jika kami lupa atau kami melakukan kesalahan. Ya Tuhan kami, janganlah Engkau bebani kami dengan beban yang berat sebagaimana Engkau bebankan kepada orang-orang sebelum kami. Ya Tuhan kami, janganlah engkau pikulkan kepada kami apa yang tidak sanggup kami memikulnya. maafkanlah kami, ampunilah kami, dan rahmatilah kami. Engkaulah pelindung kami, maka tolonglah kami menghadapi orang-orang kafir.."
(surah Al Baqarah : ayat 286)

"(mereka berdoa), Ya Tuhan kami, janganlah Engkau condongkan hati kami kepada kesesatan setelah Engkau berikan petunjuk kepada kami, dan karuniakanlah kepada kami rahmat dari sisiMu, sesungguhnya Engkau Maha Pemberi.."
(surah Al Imran : ayat 8)

Aleph!

assalamualaikum :)

lately, im so in the mood of updating my blog. kejap-kejap menulis, kejap-kejap menulis lagi.

this time, just wanna share about the book that ive just finished reading it today. Aleph by Paulo Coelho. if i were to rate this book lah kan, out of 5, i wud give 4.75 to it. i dunno. maybe because its been  a while since i last read a novel. tho before this saya memang gila novel.

its not that i never read paulo coelho's writings, before Aleph, saya penah baca the winner stands alone. its a good novel too, but guess Aleph lebih berkesan dekat hati. maybe some of the lines cm suits my situation and somehow answering some of my confusions.

people, if u were about to find a good book to read, i would highly recommend you to buy Aleph. if u love a novel without too much romance, lebih kepada kehidupan, then this is what u shud buy lah.

so, im about to start to read his another book, the zahir. i hope it'll be as good as this one too :)

entahla. baca novel ni really helps me dalam mengisi masa2 saya terluang. i bring this book everywhere i go. kdg2 dalam bus, dalam taxi, boring tatau nak watpe, so i read it. kat clinic bila bosan tade patient pun sama. and entah, suka lah! :D and even my mum pun ckp, dah nampak cm yana yang dulu, yang kdg2 boleh lost dalam dunia dia sendiri bila dia dah mula baca novel :)

"spiritual growth doesnt always arrive had-in-hand with wisdom"


"suffering comes from desire, not from pain"


"what hurts us is what heals us," she said. "life has been very hard on me, but at the same time, it has taught me a great deal. you cant see it but my body is covered in open wounds that are constantly bleeding."


"the light falls only on the stranger."


"words are tears that have been written down. tears are words that need to be shed."

goodnight :)

sampaikanlah salam :)

Saturday, 28 July 2012

when everybody is getting married..

pic courtesy of google

terasa diri tertinggal jauh. sebak. bukan sebab masih belum ada bayangan siapa yang bakal menjadi imam solat saya nanti, tapi terasa sebak di sebalik seribu satu kegembiraan, bila tahu ramai kawan-kawan terutamanya yang rapat akan move on to the next stage very soon.

tataulah its a normal feelings or what, tapi terasa mcm hilang kawan, kena share2 dah :'( nanti kalau dah kawin, sure susah nak ajak hang out, dah sume orang dah nak kawen dalam masa terdekat, nnt if nak ajak kuar, kena mntk permission bakal laki masing-masing dah ha.

true much, bila dgr sorg2 kawan sampaikan berita gembira mereka nak bertunang atau kahwin, dia punya excitements tuh, Allah je tahu. siapa tak gembira, bila tahu rakan2 dia dah bertemu jodoh, selain ucapan tahniah, doa je yang mampu dikirim, semoga semua urusan mereka dipermudahkan Allah :) tapi jauh disudut hati, terusik jugak sebenarnya. nantiiiiiiiii nak kidnap dorg sure dah susah. aaaaaaaaaaaaa!

hihi. tah pape tah yana ni. tapi betul weh. maybe this is the pressure bila your age dah reach 24 and above kot. rasanya tahun depan lagiiiiilahhhh ramai ha. peer pressure agaknya nanti. maybe disebabkan hati yang masih belum bersedia nak terbuka, tak terasa lagi nak bercinta atau ape, so xlah terasa mcm nak jugak kahwin. urusan jodoh ni urusan Allah, saya just mampu berdoa je, nak cepat-cepat sangat nak pegi mana. jadi seorang perempuan, kena cari someone yang betul-betul sayangkan kita, yang sabar dengan segala karenah kita, yang sanggup tahan dengan taufan ribut emosi dan sentiasa berusaha nak betulkan kita. semua tuh perlukan masa, perlukan toleransi kan kan? kalau dulu maybelah nak sangat kahwin cepat, tapi now, tapelah, mungkin sekarang masih belum ada rezeki :)

just a random thot, nnt masa saya kawin which to my estimation rasanya somewhere around 28 kot, sure nanti undangan untuk kawan-kawan, selain untuk mereka dan suami, sure kena tambah "dan anak-anak" :P

alahaaaiii, sonoknyaaa. congratulations dear friends, ikhlas dari sudut hati, im happy for all of you. semoga dikurniakan Allah keberkatan dalam perhubungan, dapat keluarga yang sakinah kelak, dan jodoh tuh kekal hingga ke syurga :)

perkahwinan tuh sesuatu yang sangat suci. believe it or not, setiap kali saya dengar org akad nikah, skang mesti menitis air mata. tgkla video artis ke ape sape2 lah, setiap kali dorg lafaz akad, mesti mata bergenang. sentimental sangatlah moment tuh. and i always wonder, nnt my time cane lah. boleh rosak mekap kot, sure nangis kaw-kaw. susah sangat perjalanan nak bertemu jodoh tuh, bila dah sampai masanya nanti, sure rasa sesuatu sangat :')

dah2, jangan merepek liyana. make good use of your single moments. entah bila berpeluang nak pegi wedding kawan2 ni if stranded kat jakarta ni lagi sampailah 2014 tuh. fuhh. sementara Allah tengah susun surprise tentang siapa bakal teman hidup, to me and to those yang sama situation dengan saya, let us improve ourselves to be better, Allah tengah persiapkan dia untuk menerima kita, and jom kita pun persiapkan diri kita dengan menjadi hamba Allah yang sebaiknya. if nak yang baik-baik, kita kena jadi yang baik dulu :) dan if lets say dah ada, terimalah baik buruk pasangan tuh sebaiknya, buruk dia, sabar dan sama-samalah cuba untuk berubah, semua tuh akan ambil masa, tapi kekurangan pasangan kita tuhla sebenarnya akan jadi pelengkap kita dan just imagine, kalau dia berubah, besar ganjaran dia daripada Allah :)

okay, subuh dah masuk, saja berceloteh pagi2 ni. have a nice saturday everyone. sorry mengarut2 je, tapi rasa nak bercakap, maka terhasillah post ni. assalamualaikum :)

Wednesday, 25 July 2012

favourite lines :)



" i free myself from hatred through forgiveness and love. i understand that suffering, when it cannot be avoided, is here to help me on my way to glory. i understand that everything is connected, that all roads meet, and all rivers flow into the same sea. that is why i am, at this moment, an instrument of forgiveness, forgiveness for crimes that were committed; one crime i know about, the other i do not.."

and the sayings by Hilal :

" i forgive the tears i was made to shed,
i forgive the pain and the disappointments,
i forgive the betrayals and the lies,
i forgive the slanders and intrigues,
i forgive the hatred and persecution,
i forgive the blows that hurt me,
i forgive the wrecked dreams,
i forgive the still-born hopes,
i forgive the hostility and jealousy,
i forgive the indifference and ill will,
i forgive the injustice carried out in the name of justice,
i forgive the anger and the cruelty,
i forgive the neglect and the contempt,
i forgive the world and all its evils..

i will be capable of loving regardless of whether i am loved in return,
or giving even when i have nothing,
or working happily even in  the midst of difficulties,
or holding out my hand even when utterly alone and abandoned,
of drying my tears while i weep,
of believing even when no one believes in me..."



- taken from my favourite novel - paulo coelho's : aleph :)

goodnite loves, sweet dreams :)

Thursday, 19 July 2012

ramadhan ya kareem :)

assalamualaikum..

yayy, im back in malaysia at the moment now. haha. lari escape kejap, to visit my grandma and somehow to gain back my motivation yang merudum2 jatuh. too much things that make me all stressed up. huu.

just a simple message, ramadhan is coming in two days time, lets pray together, supaya ramadhan kali ni, menjadi titik tolak untuk kita berubah ke arah yang lebih baik. bulan yang datang hanya setahun sekali, penuh barakah, sayang untuk disia-siakan. mungkin x terlalu banyak yang diperbaiki, tapi we can always to improve ourselves to be better insya Allah.

ampunkanlah dosa2 ku yang lalu ya Rabb, jadikanlah aku manusia yang lebih baik dari hari sebelumnya. jadikanlah aku hambaMu yang istiqamah dalam menjalani ibadat terutama skali di bulan penuh keberkatanMu ya Allah. amin :)

salam ramadhan, ahlan wasahlan ya Ramadhan, lama sudah kita tak bertemu :)

Saturday, 14 July 2012

=)

nak btau..

kita suka article ni =)

just a short note :)

assalamualaikum..

dear thumb toe,

its been a while u know since i last walked to any place more than 100 metres. i was absent from school for 4 days because i cant walk. no, im not blaming you, it was my fault either for not knowing the correct way of cutting my nails. boo me! :P but tomorrow, i really wish if i can go back to the campus, you know, ive got a lot of assignments to be settled and yes, my requirements are lesser than my other colleagues.

i do hope u spare some sympathy towards me, im alrite if you gonna go a bit nyut2 tomorrow, cos until now u still are, but just please, lets work together. i wont give to much force to the foot, but allow me to work whenever i have to. nothing much, just some discussions and some medical records to be attend.

:)

i know, the campus is quite far from the house if i were to walk to the campus tomorrow. ill try to find a beca, so we can reach the campus by it. please dear thumb toe, i miss school. im just bored staying at home doing nothing. im not the type of girl who loves to just sit there and doing nothing, u know me well, arent you?

alrites thumb toe, lets have some rest. tomorrow i'll wake up a bit early and gonna eat that pain killer, so that it'll work by the time im about to go to the campus. thank you, you know i love you aite?


with love,
yours truly :)



************************



sounds crazy arent i talking to my own thumb toe? but yea, i feel good that way, some sort of comforting my ownself to be a bit tough tomorrow.

you know what, i have too many things that i drafted in my mind, too many things to spill out here, but its just that i got stucked when it comes to expressing it with words. but definitely, would write something about it, its just the matter of time. weekends sounds nice i guess :)

ive been reading this for this past 4 days, such a good material to be digest by us the muslimah. please, dont hesitate to download it, or maybe u can simply read it online-ly. click here to join me reading it :)

im so excited in welcoming Ramadhan. ya Allah, give me the chance to feel the blessings of Ramadhan and all the privileges that You have stick with it. make me a better person Ya Rabb, truly from the heart. cos i know, whatever that comes purely from the heart, those are the things that will last long. bless me with the istiqamah, i just wanna be a better slave of You from day to day. insya Allah :)

good nite, assalamualaikum~


p/s : i just love the one that has been tweeted by Denabaharin, the tweet goes like this :

" i told them to stay and they leave, 
so i asked Allah to open my heart for people whom by chance came into my heart, 
and decided to stay "

Wednesday, 11 July 2012

roser plasty yang sangat menyakitkan!

assalamualaikum :)

hello dear friends. ecehh, mcm ade je yang nak baca, but tapelah, in case ;) hari ni all of us kat jakarta cuti, sebab today ada pilihanraya gubernur Jakarta. so dorg mengundi rini, or in bahasa indonesia, they called it as mencoblos. hee.

so since cuti, i take this opportunity to go to the hosp, ingat nak control kaki yang saya cite kena cengkam tuh. actually last nite, gatal pegi bukak balutan, and i found out, masih bernanah and berdarah. so somehow cam boleh budget yang today mesti kena operate. so there u go, pegi tadi mcm pegi menyerah diri je, but better lah buat, tak sanggup menahan sakit.

then taulah, i just hate the insurance punya policy kat sini. aihh. i wait for 3 hours kay just to get the confirmation whether i can proceed with the operation or not. haihh. menguji kesabaran sangat. kalo org sakit tenat kan, while waiting for the confirmation, boleh mati dulu taw tak. seriously, JPA i think next year ape kata stop pakai Admedika ni. huu. menyebelin tawuuu?

and alhamdulillah, berkat kesabaran menunggu tho sampai nak menitik air mata sbb tahan marah, akhirnya boleh proceed with the minor operation. u know what, fobia ritu kena suntik pun duk terbayang2 lagi, ni nak kena suntik lagi. huuuuwaaaa. tapi kata doctor kan, mmg saya cm pujuk hati, ko cucuk bius kat org boleh if nak cabut gigi, malulah if tak tahan sakit doc nak cucuk bius ni kat kaki.

but hakikatnya, bius kat kaki lagi sakit wey! ive felt both dah, and mmg kaki sakit gila!!!

and roser plasty tuh hanyalah selama 10minit. aduhaii. but masa die nak buang kuku and nak jahit tuh, terasa gakla sakitnyaa. die potong kuku yang saya salah potong tuh sampai ke akar dia, and he even buang the whole akar so that takkan tumbuh lagi dah kuku kat situ, then die tarik kulit yang dah flabby tuh, die jahit skali dengan kuku. fuhh. ni 1st time kena jahit okay! sobs!



ni masa awal2, die baru letak betadine and asepsis. masa ni dah berdenyut2 dah since my toe still bengkak kann. masa ni laju gila jantung sebab tau kejap lagi nak kena suntik.


ni the doctor and the nurse. sempoi habis doctor ni. i wanna see taw, but die sound "ahh, ga usah diliat, mengganggu kerja saya aja" eh ehhhh, sombongnya. of course la saya teringin nak tau sbb sy pun medical students gak, still saya curik2 tgk die buang kuku and everything. hee!


ni masa die jahit. see the jahitan? masya Allah sakit kay? :(


so all the equipments yang doc tuh pakai tadi, nampak tak fragment kuku saya? yang antara dua bekas besi tuh, pandang depan sket, ade kecikkk je. ha tuhla kuku yang die buang. hoho.


oh senyuman itu hanya bertahan sementara sahaja, sbb lepas tuh bius hilang.
sakit gilaaaaaaaaaaaa berdenyut-denyut :(


and even sampai skrg, still sakit :( pain killer mcm tak jalan pun ha. i dunno boleh tidur ke x ni. and lupe jugak nak mintak MC in case esok sakit. so nampak gaya, kena bertabah la tahan sakit, jalan jauh nak pegi kampus tuh. huuu. ya Allah, kuatkanlah. dari tadi duk motivate diri, sakit tuh menghapuskan dosa2 kecil yana, sakit beranak lagi sakit yana. but hmm, maybe saya lembik kot.

again my advice is that, potongla kuku leklok, potong straight jangan serong. nnt possibility kena cengkam tuh sangat tinggi.

take care everyone. good nite :)


p/s : sedar tak sedar, 9 months had passed, but why am i still like this. haihh.

Monday, 9 July 2012

kaki cengkam :(

assalamualaikum :)

first and foremost, im very sorry for the last three posts yang emo hari tuh. ermm, lama pendam mungkin so terlepas a few dekat blog ni. hee. but yea, you can simply forget about it :)

just wanna share a story. actually dah 5 hari tahan sakit kaki, kaki saya cengkam. sakit gile yang hari2 akan cuci nanah. to be honest, even umur dah 24 tahun pun, saya sebenarnya tak pandai potong kuku. dulu ms kat kusess, ade a friend of mine yang selalu melayan potongkan kuku. huu. miss her, konah, if u read this, really i mean it, rindu sangat nak manja2 ngan ko :(

so there u go, akibat tak pandai ptg kuku tuh, terpotong kuku kat ibu jari sampai msk agak dalam, and mmg dah boleh predict mesti jadi cengkam ni. huu. and kemuncaknya, tadi masa keja, masa sibuk2 nak mintak signature lecturer after settle cabut gigi, suddenly a friend of mine pijak sket. then me myself sendiri tersadung kaki sendiri. careless kan? (-_-)" pastu lasstttt skali, my friend terpijak again. huuu. sakittt, balik rumah cek, dah bernanah gila. so i decided to go to the doctor.

so tadi pegi and dah boleh agak, akan wat minor operation. oh my, the minor operation team sgt baik. nice sangat. masa die ngah wat mula2 tuh, masa die suntik bius, fuh, agak sakit gakla. but pastu okay je, siap saya duduk skali tgk die toreh2 kaki tuh kuarkan nanah. but towards the end, bile bius start nak habis, masya Allah, Allah je tahu sakit die cane. pastu nak jalan kuar tahan taxi lagi ape sume, sampai je dalam taxi, menitik2 air mata, sakittttt, berdenyut2 T_T

dalam hati tak habis2 mengomel, whylah tak pandai potong kuku. kena belajar bersungguh2 ni. housemate sorg dah offer diri nak tlg ptgkn, agaknye die kesian kot tgk sy menangis tadi :P hee!

my advice is that, seriously, potonglah kuku leklok. sakit sgt bile kena toreh2 mcm tuh. and if dah kena cengkam, cepat2 pegi doctor supaya nanah tuh x keras, and x sakit mcm mana saya kena tekan2 tadi sbb nak kwarkan nanah keras tuh :'(

now pun tengah sakit sbnrnye. and somehow rse mcm karma, tadi sonok sgt bius sorg nenek ni and cabut 4 fragments gigi die. huu. now malam, saya yang sakit2 ha :(

i hope im fit enough to go to school esok. dahla jauh nak jalan kaki ke kampus. tgklah mcm mana esok.

okay then, nak baca novel and get some rest, dear ibu jari kaki, tolong cepat baik ye? saya ade banyak keja nak wat, kena banyak jalan :)

but sakit tuh kan penghapus dosa kecil org kata, semoga sakit ni menghapus2 dosa2 saya. amin :)

good night, sweetdreams :)

Saturday, 7 July 2012

:'(

dan setelah lama titis air itu aku tahan,
malam ini kantung itu terhiris,
seperti terhirisnya hati..

di atas sejadah aku merintih sedih,
padaNya aku sampaikan segala perih,
nikmat setia itu indah,
tapi hatiku skrg kian parah..

untukmu aku doakan kebahagiaan,
ketenangan dan kejayaan,
biarpun dari jauh,
ikhlas ku hulur doa itu dari hati,
tanpa sedikit pun dendam yang bersarang di sanubari..

semoga satu hari dia mengerti,
erti cinta sejati,
xmampu dilihat dari jauh, tak tahu apa2 tentang yang disayangi,
hanya berdasarkan firasat hati,
mengharapkan yang terbaik,
buat seseorang yang masih berakhta di hati.

bukan marah bukan benci,
tapi rindu, yang menggugah kekuatan diri,
tiba2 datang di waktu malam,
yang telah lama dipendam,
hingga hati lemah begini.

tapi tak mengapa,
seperti yang Allah kata,
inallahama'ana,
Allah ada, Dia dengar,
dan hanya kepada Dialah sebaik2 tempat meminta pertolongan..


~puisi malam. bukan nukilan hati~

:(

siapa suka, bila setia tapi x pernah dihargai?
siapa suka, rasa derita dan menangis sendiri?
siapa suka, bertopengkan ceria dan malam memujuk hati sendiri?
siapa suka, bila segalanya seolah-olah tiada titik henti?
siapa suka?
siapa suka..

dan lebih sakit, bila buat2 tak amik peduli, tapi sebenarnya membunuh hati sanubari..

Friday, 6 July 2012

quoted

" what hurts us is what heals us. life has been very hard on me, but at the same time, it has taught me a great deal. you cant see it, but my body is covered in open wounds that are constantly bleeding. i wake each morning wanting to die before the day is out, but i continue to live, suffering and fighting, fighting and suffering, clinging on to the certainty that it will all end one day.."

from Aleph, by Paulo Coelho :)

dinner and photos :)

assalamualaikum :)

remind u first, dalam post ni banyak gambar mengarot and kind of vain jugak, so bear with it lah ye. nothing much to be told, last monday, alhamdulillah setelah sekian lama menteri2 kesygn tak datang menjenguk kami students2 kat sini and buat makan2 kat hotel (itu tujuan sbnrnyer :P), so on that day, all the MTs of Umno datang, as from what ive been informed, depa sume datang sebagai lawatan balas partai Golkar, one of parti politik kat sini.

since maybe kitorg Indonesia, and Jakarta is the main city of Indonesia, so sejak dari 1st year, memang selalu mendapat kunjungan dari menteri2 ni, and of course, bile dorg dtg, dorg akan meet up dgn students, mostly dekat hotels. so i have few list of hotels, yang bile die kata ade makan2 kat situ, i wud straight away say yes! HAHA! nak plak this time wat kat pullman hotel, yang dulunye nikko hotel kat situ, at first i was sceptical gak nak pegi, takot dah tukar nama hotel, makanan die jadi x sedap dah, but alhamdulillah, sedappp sgt!

the main guest is Dato Zahid Hamidi, menteri pertahanan. dia datang and deliver speech on several issues, about thor2 and what not. thank god, at least terasa jugak di back up. asyik2 kena condemn je. but die punya speech masya Allah lama gilaaa, just imagine i reached there at 5pm, and we can only start eating at 9pm. pfft.



gambar feeling2 ade kat negara omputeh, sbb ade mat saleh kat blkg :P






i really love this kurung, and i come with the idea, to wear it during my engagement. haha. 
letak veils ade manik2 sket, boleh je kan? :P









each and everyone of us is provided with the bendera, and saya bawak balik 3 ke rumah. 
haha. seriously i tot ade sesi nyanyi2, sambil kibar2 bendera, but tade plak.
and masa nyanyi lagu negaraku semangat gilaaa! dah lama kay x nyanyi. hoho.
and peliknya, saya hafal lagu umno. apakah?! atok tau, mesti atok marah.



there goes the food. satu pinggan beso ni saya sorg makan sampai licin.
masya Allah -___-"
ade chicken, lasagna, ade mushroom lamb, ade fish, ade sayur, ade sume lah.
yang haroommmm je tade ha.



there goes our ketua Pemuda, Khairy Jamaluddin.
fuh die mcm superstar kay that nite.
everybody wants a photo with KJ!
including me :P
hes handsome in person i shud say.
and i really wish him to deliver some speech on that nite, tapi mlgnya, takde plak.



dato' shahrizat :)




my unimates :)



and after this sume gambar mengarut, sebab dah lama x bergambar :P












nuha insists sgt nak take pictures dengan waiter ni, katanya mcm gordon levit ke ape ntah nama.
malas nak google ejaan sbnr :P







itu sahaja. on the other note, i found some nice line from Aleph,

" what cant be cured, must be endured"

and that is what im doing currently :)

Thursday, 5 July 2012

pavlova lova! :D



alhamdulillah, finally dapat gak merasa menda ni,
and lagi bermakna bila air tangan sendiri! :D

thanks nisah ajar ;)
and tho org kata manis sangat and ape,
guess with a good combinations of food,
the taste is just awesome!

i love pavlova, and definitely wud try again next time! :D